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Numbing lube

BY RICA CRUZ


Dear Doc Ms. Rica,

I am in a gay relation­ship with another boy. First relationship ko ito since I came out and I only know how to have anal sex kapag ako ‘yung nagpep­enetrate. Minsan gusto ko din ma-experience na siya ‘yung nag-eenter sa akin pero parang natatakot din ako. Sabi niya, meron daw numbing lube that helped him during his first times. Gusto ko rin tuloy subu­kan pero I wanted to ask first kung safe ba ‘yun or hindi. Thank you!

Multi Vitamins


Hi Multi Vitamins,

Congratulations in your coming out and being in a relationship. Even if madami nang mga tao na nagaaccept ng kanil­ang sexuality and gen­der identity, marami pa ring nahihirapan. Madami pang kailangan gawin to achieve gender equality for the LGBT community. It is good din that you want to be in both sides of this sexual relationship. Not only the giver but the re­ceiver also.

Ang mga numbing lube ay hindi naman talaga harmful. Pero meron itong mga qualities that deadens the sensors in the body. Parang anaesthesia ‘yung dating kaya puwedeng ang maging problem ay kapag nawala na ang effect nito. Anal sex and stimulation may be the source of plea­sure for many men dahil ang anus ay malapit sa male prostate gland pero puwede din itong maging uncomfortable dahil thin and sensitive ang tissues dito na puwedeng ma-irritate or mapunit dahil walang natural lubrica­tion. So puwedeng mapush ang limits nito habang manhid at hindi kagaya kapag nararamdaman mo ay puwede kang tumigil or magbago ng pace.

I would advise na better if you try fingering the anus muna with lubri­cants and as you progress, keep the communication kung anong comfortable or okay lang. Puwede ka din munang magstart with anal masturbation. Mer­on namang toys or anal dildos na puwede mong gamitin para malaman mo kung saan ang satisfaction mo before you jump right away sa anal sex.

Bottom line is, kung gag­amit ka ng numbing lube, you can miss out also on the satisfaction and also risking na mapush beyond the limit ang iyong back­door. Keep communicat­ing with your partner and keep exploring. Always enjoy and be safe. Bot­toms up!

With love and lust,

Doc Rica

*

Rica Cruz, PhD, RPsy is a Psy­chologist, Sex and Relationship Therapist and Sex Educator. She is a co-host of the program Feelings at OnePH Channel 1, and listen to her podcasts, Conservative Ako and The Sexy Minds. Follow her on Facebook.com/thesexymind or Insta­gram @_ricacruz.

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