Dear Manay Gina,
I am newly married, and it’s only now that I get to observe how my wife spends on things that we don’t really need. Both of us have jobs. She keeps all her money while my income is used for both of our expenses. She helps out by paying smaller house bills. I don’t mind carrying the whole financial load, but I feel that her spending is a little out of control. In fairness, she also spends a lot of money on me, mostly on things that I don’t really need and want. She says, she just wants to make me happy because she loves me. I don’t see it as practical though, and I think she’s being a little irresponsible.
There are a million reasons why women love to shop. Perhaps, she feels that spending money on you, is something she should be doing to make you happy. It could also be, that her friends are doing the same to their husbands. Or maybe, shopping is something that she truly enjoys like most women.
If the cause of her frequent shopping is insecurity, the best thing you can do is to reassure her and make her feel more secure. You may remind that you didn’t marry her for the things that she could buy for you, and what you truly need is for her to be healthy, happy and fulfilled. You can also encourage her to turn into activities that are enjoyable and not as expensive, like cooking a surprise dinner perhaps instead of dining out. Just think of things that are fun, less expensive, and something that you’ll enjoy doing together.
However, if her spending turns out of control, then you need to sit down together, and consider about planning your finances and achieve shared goals.
“Infinitely more important than sharing one’s material wealth is sharing the wealth of ourselves our time and energy, our passion and commitment, and, above all, our love.“ William E. Simon
Send questions to email@example.com